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Suckerfish

by Scholtz

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Comes in a wallet-style case with terrific, digital artwork by Deyo Glines.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Suckerfish via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $10 USD  or more

     

1.
Suckerfish 04:15
Lost in the cloudy and murky depths of self-destructive maladies I spotted you searching for salvation and somehow you spot it in me Longing was hemorrhaging from your eyes; it was obvious for me to see I recognized the need right away cause the feelings reflected in me I’m just a suckerfish searching this ocean with you Believing what you said was real, that we’ll be together forever Maybe you meant it or maybe you’re leading me on Either way I’m still here with you, maybe that just means that you’re a suckerfish too Somehow we’ve managed to get this far, despite our different degrees Parasites paired off with obvious lifestyle discrepancies I’m here for you as you’re here for me; maybe that’s all that we need We’d be both lost in this ocean of faults, we’re suckerfish now you and me I’m just a suckerfish searching this ocean with you Believing what you said was real, that we’ll be together forever Maybe you meant it or maybe you’re leading me on Either way I’m still here with you, maybe that just means that you’re a suckerfish too Maybe it’s wrong we’ve shunned all the rest But I can’t deny that I need you to death yeah My very salvation is tied up with you. Yeah I need you I’m just a suckerfish searching this ocean with you Believing what you said was real, that we’ll be together forever Maybe you meant it or maybe you’re leading me on Either way I’m still here with you, maybe that just means that you’re a sucker I’m just a suckerfish searching this ocean with you Believing what you said was real, that we’ll be together forever Maybe you meant it or maybe you’re leading me on Either way I’m still here with you, maybe that just means that you’re a suckerfish too
2.
The Tinkerer 03:03
I found you love, through divine inspiration Now, after years, your health has complications And my faith has failed, so I turn to science I’ll find a way. I can’t be alone. I can’t live without you. I’ll search both far and wide for anything to try To keep you safe and right here by my side I’ve tinkered on all my failed inventions And crying out all of my frustrations I’ve tried to invent cures on my own I’ve tried both real and obscure things I know I’m doing all I can for you We’ve tried every cure from distant lands The skills of every medicine man And still I’m nowhere closer to saving you Cause I’ve tried and tried to find the equation Fingers ache and mind needs elation From knowing there’s nothing more I can do for you Cause every time I see your face More anemic every day It only gets harder and harder and harder and harder So what now? I can only figure That the answer lies somewhere in science
3.
I Have To Let Go The longest of nights melt into days Days that bring no answers or hope in anyway I see you laying there, your helpless empty stare Regarding worlds beyond us of which I am not aware I pace the isle between faith and technology Wishing the machines inside of you were instead inside of me The longer that you stay the more I feel ashamed Ashamed of wanting this to end by any means On and on time goes by and I see you suffer every night And in your eyes you’re telling me that “no I have to let go” It breaks my heart and worries me but I can’t seem to say Because I’m such a coward I want the easy way No matter what I do the pain for me is you It’s too much for me to bear. I’m sorry. On and on time goes by and I see you suffer every night And in your eyes you’re telling me that “no I have to let go”
4.
Little Things A fractured mug, a half melted candle, pages in an often-perused book A crocheted towel, an unused bag of spices, photos of a thousand miles away Falling asleep seems to be the hardest thing to do without you Lying in bed used to be our special sacred place now it’s the last thing I can face House is filled with items I remember as being so much of what defined you Days are long the nights are even longer, the thought of you still wakes me from my sleep There’re too many reminders that you’re not here Falling asleep seems to be the hardest thing to do without you Lying in bed used to be our special sacred place now it’s the last thing I can face I can face without you there All these things are just reminding me of you Little things you loved, you now imbue I can only lose myself in my machines Replace my heart with gears of brass and copper infused beryllium springs My machines don’t think of comfort I want to feel no more pain
5.
Malady 03:53
I’ve been where most will never go I’ve seen what most will never know I’ve spent so much time trying all I can do to keep you alive I never thought it’d be easy Now I wonder what it takes When my soul feels like it’s gonna break From the feelings I have buried in my heart deep down inside Exploding out of me Cause I gave my life for you And I promised to protect you And I journeyed far from home All the promises you said Mean only nothing now cause instead Now I’m forced to go alone I can’t believe places I’ve been All to fix a life that failed to mend It’s getting harder to remember how we started way back when And all our naïve plans Cause I gave my life for you And I promised to protect you And I journeyed far from home All the promises you said Mean only nothing now cause instead Now I’m forced to go alone Cause I gave my life for you And I promised to protect you And I journeyed far from home All the promises you said Mean only nothing now cause instead Now I’m forced to go alone
6.
Love Like Machines by Ahren Scholtz Love like machines throw away all you once believed Love like machines bury what you want but can’t achieve Love like machines surrender what’s left of your humanity Love like machines In a state of constant changes and love can take so much time What we need is effervescent but slips through our fingers like twine What can we do when things change? When love leaves us pained in misery? Love like machines throw away all you once believed Love like machines bury what you want but can’t achieve Love like machines surrender what’s left of your humanity Love like machines When we live instant to instant, the ‘whens’ all turn into ‘nows’ Nothing matters of the future, the past no longer brings us down What’s the price that we’re paying To give up what gives us frailty? There’s never the pain of loneliness, there’s never emotional need Love like machines throw away all you once believed Love like machines bury what you want but can’t achieve Love like machines surrender what’s left of your humanity Love like machines Love like machines when life fills you with despondency Love like machines when our hearts break from our tragedies Love like machines turn away and bury what you breed Love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines love like machines
7.
Give Me More 03:35
Give Me More Unsatiated with the promise of youth but I never knew the price of the truth And I’d pay the toll a hundred times over to be with you I love what you do I’m not obsessed but you really impress with the way you move with nothing to lose The twists and turns that your body’s been making just turn me on And activate my machine, activate my machine. Activate my machine! Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take Anymore, she said “More! You’re filling me up In the bed, on the floor.” I want you so bad Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take anymore. The way you feel when we’re all alone just feels so right. More then I’ve known. And do you feel the way I burn deep inside? I know you do. Your heart doesn’t lie I must insist that being with you is all I need and I must confess You drive me wild with your walk and your style to insanity But it’s just a fantasy, it’s just a fantasy, it’s just a fantasy Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take Anymore, she said “More! You’re filling me up In the bed, on the floor.” I want you so bad Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take anymore. Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take Anymore, she said “More! You’re filling me up In the bed, on the floor.” I want you so bad Give me more give me more, ‘til I cannot take anymore.
8.
After several years I had no clue about moving on from a life without you And then one day I saw her appear, conquered me whole with a flip of her hair It’s your memory I’ll keep inside And Butterscotch Mary would only be that one time Now I’d seen beauty and I’d seen grace But I couldn’t resist the sight of her gorgeous face She took her time and I studied the scene As she picked out which topping to put on her ice cream It’s your memory I’ll keep inside And Butterscotch Mary would only be that one time She commanded my complete attention And the voice she spoke with was so bright Eyes like tea with a playful warm expression Gazed back into mine At that moment I saw you appear with a warning of what would happen if she drew near She introduced herself as Mary then I thought to myself “Can I do this again?” It’s your memory I’ll keep inside And Butterscotch Mary would only be for that night It’s your memory I’ll keep inside And Butterscotch Mary would only be for that night
9.
A Great Escape What if you and I got out of this place? Just like those old movies and make a great escape? We could start again, start up whole new lives No more living thoughts of stress or stepping back to compromise Just like when we were young And all our problems added up to none What if we got out of here And all our problems harkened back to where we used to be What’s the first thing you’ll do when you get out? Forgive yourself for getting broken down? Let your thoughts caress the things you love What matters most we got and we pushed back when it came to shove Just like when we were young And all our problems added up to none What if we got out of here And all our problems harkened back to where we used to be And we can make our escape What if we got out of here And all our problems harkened back to where we used to be
10.
Lady 04:12
Lady Lady, beautiful Lady Where did I go to? Why did I run? Oh and Lady, wonderful Lady When will love come back? And can I return? It doesn’t matter how many miles lay between us or how many years go by I’ll remember the facial ticks you’d get when there was something on your mind All those nights spent watching SNL repeats, drinking Earl Grey in our bedroom Those times meant so much to me that I lost it without you Lady, it seems that lately The guilt from my actions has caught up with me Oh and lately, I’m noticing faintly A ghostly presence from my memory Did I just imagine holding on to you like Romeo held Juliet? Even though there were times I begged for forgiveness, taken by your baited breath Thought I’d finally moved on to know somebody that could take away all my pain But your memory never leaves, no, it never goes away Oh Lady, oh Lady Where did I run to? Why did I go?
11.
Ignite 04:03
Ignite Working on my broke machines Locked and fixated on wild and childish dreams Praying for my time to come You came into my little world and shook things up That sight of you was set forever and made me forget things I’d found Right then I changed all of my wanting when you said your name out aloud Needing someone to repair my old guitar and broken heart with ease and care Watching your hands tinker on with steadiness and understanding of my wants That sight of you was set forever and made me forget things I’d found Right then I changed all of my wanting when you said your name out aloud Then I felt the sound pulse ignite Playing with no end in sight The melodies from both our hearts are intertwined Tinkering on the broke and lost You made me see I needed you no matter cost And the aria sounds like a hurricane and I’ve never felt this much alive And I feel our love is never ending and it seems that everything will turn out fine Despite all the tragedies You gave me hope to carry on and cherish all the little things Oh Lady

about

A concept album that tells the story of a man who is devastated by the loss of his loved one. In his pain, he turns to machines, throwing himself into their unfeeling state until he meets someone new...and the cycle starts once again.

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released November 9, 2013

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Scholtz Everett, Washington

Scholtz is Ahren Scholtz, a singer/songwriter expressing the bits of life's randomness into coherency, one song at a time.

Recorded at Earwig Studio and mixed by Don Farwell.
Mastered at Hanzsek Studio.

Bass and Keys: Drew Mitchell
Drums: Bill Ibsen
Lead Guitar: Ilya Ignatov
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